2) Thou shalt not follow the NULL pointer, for chaos and madness await thee at its end. % When windows crashes, at least it lets you click 'OK' first. % > C:\WINDOWS > C:\WINDOWS\GO > C:\PC\CRAWL % Windows has detected that the mouse has moved. Please restart for the change to take effect. % End hunger Save the whales Free the mallocs % Computer - A device designed to speed and automate errors. % "The Microsoft Exchange Information Store service depends on the Microsoft Exchange Directory service which failed to start because of the following error: The operation completed successfully." % Security-wise, NT is a server with a "Kick me" sign taped to it. -- Peter Gutmann % cat /dev/coffee | /dev/cup | /dev/mouth | /dev/nose > /dev/keyboard % "But these [serious NT security flaws] are not inherent flaws in the operating system -- they don't happen by accident. They are the result of deliberate and well-thought-out efforts." -- Mike Nash, Microsoft. % "The idea that Bill Gates has appeared like a knight in shining armour to lead all customers out of a mire of technological chaos neatly ignores the fact that it was he who, by peddling second-rate technology, led them into it in the first place." -- writer Douglas Adams, on Windows 95 % Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do." % Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse. -- Murphy's Seventh Law After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat itself. -- Farnsdick's corollary % Windows 95: n. 32 bit extensions and a graphical shell for a 16 bit patch to an 8 bit operating system originally coded for a 4 bit microprocessor, written by a 2 bit company, that can't stand 1 bit of competition. % "We will encourage you to develop the three great virtues of a programmer : laziness, impatience, and hubris." --- from Programming in Perl, page xiii. % "Subroutine and format declarations are global declarations. No matter where you place them, they declare global thingies (actually, package thingies, but packages are global) that are visible from anywhere." --- from Programming in Perl, page 106. % customer: "I have Windows 95 on my computer." tech: "Yes." customer: "My computer isn't working right." tech: "Yes. You already told me that." % Linux: It's not just for breakfast any more % Some go for the carrot approach, others the stick, others both. If you favour the carrot, try offering memory upgrades or faster processors. For sticks, try bullwhips. Many computers are easily fooled, so placing a picture of yourself in front of a computer will often cause it to think you are watching and it will be too scared to misbehave. -- from the FAQ for alt.sysadmin.recovery % "Every program has at least one bug and can be shortened by at least one instruction -- from which, by induction, one can deduce that every program can be reduced to one instruction which doesn't work." -- Anon. % In article <4dpnqb$9n7@news.computek.net>, Steve wrote: >IBM says its AS/400 mainframe is UNHACKABLE!! Is this true? You miss the AS/400. You miss the AS/400. --More-- You miss the AS/400. The AS/400 hits. --More-- You miss the AS/400. You miss the AS/400. Apparently so. -- David 'Gotterdammerung' Damerell, in rec.games.roguelike.nethack % REBOOT(8) MAINTENANCE COMMANDS REBOOT(8) NAME reboot - restart the operating system [...] OPTIONS -n Avoid the sync(1). It can be used if a disk or the processor is on fire. % To err is human; to really screw things up requires the root password % In a recent press conference, Intel stated: "Not only is the new Pentium 4 a technological breakthrough in terms of processing performance, but users can cook 4 hamburgers in under 10 minutes on it's new larger-sized heatsink" -- UltraBot2K1 on slashdot.org % Sleep is for the weak. % If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in. % A chicken is an egg's way of producing more eggs. % Q: Why don't blind people sky-dive? A: It scares the crap out of their dogs. % The three R's of Microsoft support: Retry, Reboot, Reinstall. % My software never has bugs, it just develops random features. % "Technology is just another word for it doesn't work yet" -- Douglas Adams % while (!asleep()) sheep++; % "Of course it doesn't work, but look how fast it is!" % STUPID: Losing $25 on the tackle and $25 on the instant replay. % A master was explaining the nature of Tao to one of his novices. "The Tao is embodied in all software -- regardless of how insignificant," said the master. "Is Tao in a hand-held calculator?" asked the novice. "It is," came the reply. "Is the Tao in a video game?" continued the novice. "It is even in a video game," said the master. "And is the Tao in the DOS for a personal computer?" The master coughed and shifted his position slightly. "The lesson is over for today," he said. % Hardware, n.: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked. % "Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining." -- Jeff Raskin, interviewed in Doctor Dobb's Journal % USER, n.: The word computer professionals use when they mean "idiot." -- Dave Barry, "Claw Your Way to the Top" % You know you've been spending too much time on the computer when your friend misdates a check, and you suggest adding a "++" to fix it. % As soon as we started programming, we found to our surprise that it wasn't as easy to get programs right as we had thought. Debugging had to be discovered. I can remember the exact instant when I realized that a large part of my life from then on was going to be spent in finding mistakes in my own programs. -- Maurice Wilkes discovers debugging, 1949 % At Group L, Stoffel oversees six first-rate programmers, a managerial challenge roughly comparable to herding cats. -- The Washington Post Magazine, 9 June, 1985 % Everyone can be taught to sculpt: Michelangelo would have had to be taught how __not to. So it is with the great programmers. % It is practically impossible to teach good programming style to students that have had prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration. -- Dijkstra % Our documentation manager was showing her two year old son around the office. He was introduced to me, at which time he pointed out that we were both holding bags of popcorn. We were both holding bottles of juice. But only *he* had a lollipop. He asked his mother, "Why doesn't HE have a lollipop?" Her reply: "He can have a lollipop any time he wants to. That's what it means to be a programmer." % Real programmers don't comment their code. It was hard to write, it should be hard to understand. % Real programmers don't draw flowcharts. Flowcharts are, after all, the illiterate's form of documentation. Cavemen drew flowcharts; look how much good it did them. % Real Programmers don't play tennis, or any other sport that requires you to change clothes. Mountain climbing is OK, and real programmers wear their climbing boots to work in case a mountain should suddenly spring up in the middle of the machine room. % THE LESSER-KNOWN PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES #18: C- This language was named for the grade received by its creator when he submitted it as a class project in a graduate programming class. C- is best described as a "low-level" programming language. In fact, the language generally requires more C- statements than machine-code statements to execute a given task. In this respect, it is very similar to COBOL. % To the systems programmer, users and applications serve only to provide a test load. % Weinberg's Second Law: If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. % A novice was trying to fix a broken Lisp machine by turning the power off and on. Knight, seeing what the student was doing spoke sternly: "You can not fix a machine by just power-cycling it with no understanding of what is going wrong." Knight turned the machine off and on. The machine worked. % Intelligence: Finding an error in a Knuth text. Stupidity: Cashing that $2.56 check you got. % A Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer is to computing what a McDonalds Certified Food Specialist is to fine cuisine % Linux: Cheaper than crack, and lots more fun! % Microsoft will make something that doesn't suck when it starts manufactoring vaccum cleaners. -- car bumper sticker % With Linux there is no Bill to pay -- Maurice Fonhof % Some people have told me they don't think a fat penguin really embodies the grace of Linux, which just tells me they have never seen an angry penguin charging at them in excess of 100 mph. They'd be a lot more careful about what they said if they had. -- Linus Torvalds % Linux is a cancer - Steve Ballmer Unsurprisingly, that's incorrect; LINUX was released on August 25th, 1991 and is therefore a virgo. % Yeah, Windows is great... I used it to download Linux. % Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface. % A fool and his money are soon venture capital % "Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next. % Welcome to Microsoft Cafe our specials today are vaporware, broken promises, and no we do not have Java. % The more I learn about the Internet, the more amazed I am that it works at all. % Programmers are busy writing the next best idiot proof software. The universe, in the meantine,is busy making the next best idiot. The universe is winning. % With Windows Millenium MS was able to get the boot time down to 25 seconds. That's almost as short as it's uptime. % You can tell how desperate they are by counting the number of times they say "innovate" in their press releases. % ;; It appears that /dev/null is a conforming XSL processor % "'Tis some script kidd3z," I muttered, "tapping at my server port - Only this, and nothing more." % I'll pretend like there's something witty here, and you pretend like you laughed at it. % Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot % Moore's Law: Every 18 months the speed of hardware doubles Gates' Law: Every 18 months, the speed of software halves. % "One World, one Web, one Program" - Microsoft promotional ad "Ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Fuhrer" - Adolf Hitler % "It's better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool, than to open it and remove all doubt." % "There's a fine line between stupid and clever" - Nigel from Spinal Tap % The quiet ones are the ones who change the world. The loud ones only take the credit. % Things are only impossible until they are not. % How's my programming? Call 1-800-DEV-NULL % Disclaimer: I'm not as smart as I think I am. % Those who do not understand Unix are condemned to reinvent it, poorly. % War determines not who is right, but who is left. % Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation. % Never ask a geek why, just nod your head and slowly back away. -Rob Malda % Computers run the world. Geeks run the Computers. You do the math. % Closed mouths gather no feet % There are three types of people in this world: Those who can count, and those who can't. % He who laughs last thinks slowest! % Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else % Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. % Error, no keyboard - press F1 to continue. % Logic: The art of being wrong with confidence... % These aren't the droids you're looking for. Move along. % This is an I-Mail. Also avaliable in orange, purple, and teal. % On the other hand, you have different fingers % Microsoft Windows: made for the internet The Internet: made for UNIX % If you don't have anything nice to say say it often. -Ed the Sock % do { Work(); PayTaxes(); Eat(); Sleep(); } while (alive) % If Bill Gates had a nickel for every time Windows crashed... ..oh wait, he does. % "Only two things are infinite: The universe, and human stupidity. And I'm not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein % There are no stupid questions, but there are a lot of inquisitive idiots % /me speaks in the third person. % "On the Internet, there is no 'they'. There's only a very, very large 'us'." - Douglas Adams. % "When they took away the Fourth Amendment, I said nothing. I didn't deal in drugs. When they took away the Sixth Amendment, I said nothing. I was innocent. When they took away the Second Amendment, I said nothing. I didn't own a gun. Now they've taken away the First Amendment, and I can say nothing." -author unknown % Give a man a fire and you keep him warm for a night. Set him on fire and you keep him warm for the rest of his life. % Give a man a fish and feed him for a night. Teach a man to fish and feed him for life. % The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offence. -- Edsger W. Dijkstra, SIGPLAN Notices, Volume 17, Number 5 % "All will become clear, never fear. And if it doesn't, make something up." -- Lady Gayle % As a professional humorist, I often get letters from readers who are interested in the basic nature of humor. "What kind of a sick perverted disgusting person are you," these letters typically ask, "that you make jokes about setting fire to a goat?" ... -- Dave Barry, "Why Humor is Funny" % Five is a sufficiently close approximation to infinity. -- Robert Firth % Fertility is hereditary. If your parents didn't have any children, neither will you. % "It's bad luck to be superstitious." -- Andrew W. Mathis % Yes, but every time I try to see things your way, I get a headache. % Baruch's Observation: If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. % Q: How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to the earlier joke. % "Picture the sun as the origin of two intersecting 6-dimensional hyperplanes from which we can deduce a certain transformational sequence which gives us the terminal velocity of a rubber duck ..." % The 80's -- when you can't tell hairstyles from chemotherapy. % Harry is heavily into camping, and every year in the late fall, he makes us all go to Assateague, which is an island on the Atlantic Ocean famous for its wild horses. I realize that the concept of wild horses probably stirs romantic notions in many of you, but this is because you have never met any wild horses in person. In person, they are like enormous hooved rats. They amble up to your camp site, and their attitude is: "We're wild horses. We're going to eat your food, knock down your tent and poop on your shoes. We're protected by federal law, just like Richard Nixon." -- Dave Barry, "Tenting Grandpa Bob % It is much easier to suggest solutions when you know nothing about the problem. % Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun. Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-eight million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue-green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea ... -- Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" % Real computer scientists don't program in assembler. They don't write in anything less portable than a number two pencil. % Every Horse has an Infinite Number of Legs (proof by intimidation): Horses have an even number of legs. Behind they have two legs, and in front they have fore-legs. This makes six legs, which is certainly an odd number of legs for a horse. But the only number that is both even and odd is infinity. Therefore, horses have an infinite number of legs. Now to show this for the general case, suppose that somewhere, there is a horse that has a finite number of legs. But that is a horse of another color, and by the [above] lemma ["All horses are the same color"], that does not exist. % It is an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much -- the wheel, New York wars and so on -- whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man -- for precisely the same reasons. -- Douglas Admas "The Hitch-Hikers' Guide To The Galaxy" % There are many intelligent species in the universe. They all own cats. % In the days when Sussman was a novice Minsky once came to him as he sat hacking at the PDP-6. "What are you doing?", asked Minsky. "I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe." "Why is the net wired randomly?", asked Minsky. "I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play." Minsky shut his eyes. "Why do you close your eyes?", Sussman asked his teacher. "So the room will be empty." At that moment, Sussman was enlightened. % Real software engineers work from 9 to 5, because that is the way the job is described in the formal spec. Working late would feel like using an undocumented external procedure. % Information Center, n.: A room staffed by professional computer people whose job it is to tell you why you cannot have the information you require. % "The most difficult thing in the world is to know how to do a thing and to watch someone else do it wrong without comment." -- Theodore H. White % "The way to make a small fortune in the commodities market is to start with a large fortune." % Men were real men, women were real women, and small, furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were REAL small, furry creatures from Alpha Centauri. Spirits were brave, men boldly split infinitives that no man had split before. Thus was the Empire forged. -- "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy", Douglas Adams % There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. -- Douglas Adams, "The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy" % This planet has -- or rather had -- a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movements of small green pieces of paper, which is odd because on the whole it wasn't the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy. -- Douglas Adams % Bolub's Fourth Law of Computerdom: Project teams detest weekly progress reporting because it so vividly manifests their lack of progress. % The primary purpose of the DATA statement is to give names to constants; instead of referring to pi as 3.141592653589793 at every appearance, the variable PI can be given that value with a DATA statement and used instead of the longer form of the constant. This also simplifies modifying the program, should the value of pi change. -- FORTRAN manual for Xerox Computers % Real programmers don't write in BASIC. Actually, no programmers write in BASIC after reaching puberty. % A bash poem: time for echo in canyon; do echo $echo $echo; done % 'One Microsoft Way' is more than an address. % "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." --Thomas Edison % Remember that 50% of people are even dumber than the average. % If it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet. % "The Internet is like a gateway to the net" - Bob Dole % I have a Life and a Clue. They're sitting on the shelf next to Monopoly % The only people in a free society who worry about anarchy are those in power. % Complexity is easy. Simplicity is hard % This year, I resolve to 127.0.0.1 % If you don't agree with me, you are probably wrong. % Give a man a fish, he owes you one fish. Teach a man to fish, you give up your monopoly on fisheries. % If God had intended man to use the metric system, Jesus would have only had ten disciples. % I still maintain the point that designing a monolithic kernel in 1991 is a fundamental error. Be thankful you are not my student. You would not get a high grade for such a design :-) -- Andrew Tanenbaum to Linus Torvalds % "Memory is like gasoline. You use it up when you are running. Of course you get it all back when you reboot..."; -- Actual explanation obtained from the Micro$oft help desk. % "Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar." -- Drew Carey % "Suppose you were an idiot... And suppose you were a member of Congress... but I repeat myself." -- Mark Twain % Anyone who trusts technology, doesn't understand technology. % Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later. % If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce today would cost $100, get a million miles to the gallon, and explode once every few weeks, killing everyone inside. % Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes. % "If the Start Windows Restart when Windows starts check box is checked Windows Restart will start automatically every time Windows is started." -- Actual excerpt from a windows program help file % "C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot. C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg." -- Bjarne 'Stumpy' Stroustrup % Computer Science: solving today's problems tomorrow. % To know recursion, you must first know recursion. % cthread. cthread_fork(). Fork, thread, fork! % Beta. Software undergoes beta testing shortly before it's released. Beta is Latin for 'still doesn't work.' % VI VI VI The editor of the beast. % A good programmer is someone who looks both ways before crossing a one-way street. -- Doug Linder % My operat~1 system unders~1 long filena~1 , does yours? % Being married to a programmer is like having a cat. You talk to it but you're never really sure if it hears you, much less comprehends what you say. % Mac OS X. Because making Unix user-friendly is easier than debugging Windows. % Claiming that your operating system is the best in the world because more people use it is like saying McDonalds makes the best food in the world. % A computer without a Microsoft operating system is like a dog without bricks tied to its head. % Last week, I left my 2 XP CDs on my dashboard in plain view. Someone broke into my car and left 2 more % You are lost in a twisty maze of little standards, all different. % Banning software to prevent "contributory piracy" is like banning automobiles to prevent "contributory bank robbing" % "Hit a man on the head with a fish, and he'll have a headache for a day..." % "It only takes 20 years for a liberal to become a conservative without changing a single idea." -- Robert Anton Wilson % You are what you think. % It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue. >_ % "A senior Microsoft Corp. executive [Jim Allchin] told a federal court last week that sharing information with competitors could damage national security and even threaten the U.S. war effort in Afghanistan. He later acknowledged that some Microsoft code was so flawed it could not be safely disclosed." -- Caron Carlson, eWeek May 13, 2002 % "No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country." -- George S. Patton % "The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time. The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time." -- Tom Cargill of Bell Labs % "The time from now until the completion of the project tends to become constant." % Pessimist : "The glass is half empty" Optimist : "The glass is half full" Pragmatist: "The glass is too big" % Think nothing is impossible? Try slamming a revolving door. % "Pokey, are you drunk?" "Yes, but on love. And whisky. But mainly whisky." % "Some of these corporations, we are told, have their own little networks--that is very clearly illegal." -- RIAA President Cary Sherman % The best defense against logic is ignorance. % I don't have a solution, but I certainly admire the problem. % The world is run by idiots because they're more efficient than hamsters. % You should never take life too seriously - You'll never get out of it alive. % Jobs also stressed that the iPod and iTunes did not include any built-in digital rights management (DRM) features. "Piracy is not a technology issue; it's a behavior issue," he said, noting that every security scheme based on technology and secrets has so far been defeated. % "We haven't figured out how to be lower priced than Linux" -- Steve Ballmer, Microsoft % "Unix admins cost more than MCSEs, too." -- Steve Ballmer, Microsoft I guess it's true - you do get what you pay for. % "Yes I know you can see it in MSIE, but you could feed MSIE a banana and it would think it was HTML, try it with a browser that only accepts valid HTML for the full blank page effect" -- Jeff Zucker, comp.lang.perl.misc % Being a System Administrator is like being the phone company. Nobody ever calls up to say: "You know, this thing works great. Thanks!" % When your boss asks why you should follow web standards say: 1 out of 10 customers can't use an Internet Explorer only website. % I went to the 24 hour store and the clerk was closing up. "I thought you were open 24 hours." "Not in a row." % "When the cops talk about the war on crime and the war on drugs, everyone needs to understand that they view us, the civilians, as the enemy." % "In the long run, the internet means that there IS NO "Information Economy". Economy as humanity knows it is effectively the redistribution of scarce resources, and the internet makes information non-scarce. Imagine your neighbour had a magic-car-cloning-ray. Would you begrudge him a clone of your car? You'd still have a car, he'd still have a car, everyone's better off. It's not like he'd be stealing your car. Well, the internet is a magic-information-cloning-ray." -- Anonymous on Slashdot % 1) X=Y ; Given 2) X^2=XY ; Multiply both sides by X 3) X^2-Y^2=XY-Y^2 ; Subtract Y^2 from both sides 4) (X+Y)(X-Y)=Y(X-Y) ; Factor 5) X+Y=Y ; Cancel out (X-Y) term 6) 2Y=Y ; Substitute X for Y, by equation 1 7) 2=1 ; Divide both sides by Y -- "Omni", proof that 2 equals 1 % One by one the penguins steal my sanity % The UNIX philosophy basically involves giving you enough rope to hang yourself. And then a couple of feet more, just to be sure. % The difference between theory and practice is that in theory, there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice, there is. % There is no need for any individual to have a computer in their home. -- Ken Olson, 1977, President, Digital Equipment Corp. % GATTSUO'S EXTENSION OF MURPHY'S LAW: Nothing is ever so bad that it can't get worse. % FIRST POSTULATE OF ISO-MURPHISM: Things equal to nothing else are equal to each other. % HIGDON'S LAW: Good judgment comes from bad exprience. Exprience comes from bad judgment. % Supreme court is just like regular court, except it also has tomatoes and sour cream. % "Welcome to Whose Line is it Anyway. Where everything is made up, and the points are so worthless they might as well end in 'dot com'" -- Drew Carey, Whose Line is it Anyway % "The artists had the option to not sign that contract, but they signed it. Therefore they agreed to the terms of the contract, and they are not getting ripped off in any way shape or form, unless the record company is violating that contract." A farmer in Bangladesh needs money to buy seed, signs a contract with the moneylender that makes his family indentured servants until he pays it back, which he cannot because of the ruinous interest and the low prices the moneylender (who is also the only grain purchaser) pays. He agreed to the terms, no one was ripped off, justice prevails. Legal != Just. % "As for the social-engineering aspect, people have been doing that all over the world, for centuries. Only a few of them are called hackers. The rest are called journalists." -- scrain, slashdot.org article about Social Engineering and AOL % "The condensed version: A band that sells 500,000 records for $8,490,000 gross ends up (after a few iterations of the new math) with $161,909 in their pocket. Split four ways, that's a whopping $40,477.25 each for a record that probably took close to a year to produce. And this is for a record that goes gold (as per the article, only 128 of some 30,000 records released in 2002 were so privileged). And I bet you wanted to be a rock star when you were a kid..." http://hoopajoo.net/misc/nydaily_01.html % How much do rockstars make? Nirvana made $4,031.25 for in Utero, according to the producer: http://www.negativland.com/albini.html % Who owns your politicians? - http://www.opensecrets.org - % "UNIX is old, a lot older than the other operating systems that have long since passed on. In spite of its twenty-six years, however, UNIX continues to crunch numbers while younger systems can only gum them till they're mushy. What explains this mysterious longevity?" % A day without sunshine is like night. % Osborn's Law: Variables won't; constants aren't.